So as my "last first week" comes to a close, I have no idea how I am going to maintain the pace that this week has wrought. As you are aware, I stayed on at the PD and have committed to work three days a week in addition to my courseload and activities at school. This week was essentially a test week to see if I could attempt to juggle everything and manage to do well in class. Hmmm.. I have only come to the wavering conclusion that maybe I can, maybe I can't. Perhaps this week shouldn't be the example on which to base my predictions or dare say hopes about the upcoming semester. I've already dropped 2 classes and added 2 classes. I have failed to prepare for each class adequately.
Why?
I'm having difficulty getting into the routine of things and adapting to my new schedule plus there are some social obligations that have, ahem, dominated my time. I attended a pool party on Saturday, a wedding on Sunday, and yet another wedding that has required significant wardrobe preparation and travel this coming weekend. All of this has led to scrambling around to do everything in little bits of time here and there. I hope that things will settle a bit upon our return from the wedding but I'm not so confident. The assigned readings and required class participation in most of my classes are seemingly insurmountable. I've already tried to score a few brownie points by volunteering in class but that didn't work in one of my classes today. After volunteering, the Prof called on me and of course I hadn't read the assigned reading. Luckily, it was a case that I had read way back when in Contracts. I struggled a bit to answer his question and he certainly didn't have the "you're a star pupil" response to my attempts at answering his questions. Sigh. Unfortunately this has happened a couple of times this week. My answers I'm sure sound as distracted and as circular as what's going on in my head at the time. It feels impossible to articulate relatively simple concrete facts and I just don't feel that I will be capable of really becoming engaged in discussion. This seems to be general consensus in the 3L dominated classes but not so much in the 2L dominated-classes where I guess they're still trying to feel out how it works and the fear factor is prevalent. The old adage I guess it true, by the time you reach third year, you are so burned out and tired of law school, that this overwhelming sense of boredom and yes, even sadness that you're sitting here bored out of your mind when you could be earning $$ or working on your tan. I hope this "feeling" subsides somewhat or it's going to be a ridiculously long year.
